No One In Control Issues An Ultimatum

Ultimatums are usually framed: “If you don’t do X, I will leave you” but I think a more accurate phrasing is: “Something between us is broken and you need to do X to mend it”
There is no dialogue in an ultimatum, it is a violent forcing of action from a desperate place
Some people speak of their ultimatums and subsequent changes in their partner’s behaviour with pride as if to boast of their partner’s devotion to them but this is like bragging about peace during the Cold War